There are two things guaranteed to cause even the most hardened Dorset driver to sink into a state of total despair, a state where even the basic will to live is drained dry. I am of course talking about Tourist Caravans, and Horse Transporters 🙁
Caravans are a common curse and are regularly seen trundling along our roads being followed by huge queues of traffic unable to overtake… That’s annoying enough, but why do these tin-tent draggers decide to take their monstrosities down single-track country lanes without having the ability to reverse or perform any other form of manoeuvre to prevent an approaching road user having to reverse half a mile to find a wide-enough passing point? Probably poorly programmed Sat Navs which direct them through farm yards, cart tracks, ploughed fields, and country lanes that are too damned narrow for them [Grrr]
But they aren’t the worst of the Dorset road nightmares! Farm vehicles and slow tractors I don’t mind at all, HGVs and wide loads I can tolerate, but bloody Horse Transporters driven by women more used to driving Nissan Micras, possessing as much roadcraft as the average housebrick, and all the sympathy of a Spanish Inquisition Torturer I loathe with every fibre of my body…
Irrespective of the speed limit they go everywhere at 20mph, wander over lane dividers willy nilly, treat roundabouts as their personal property without ever stopping at the line, cut every corner and junction, will never give way or reverse on a single track road even if they’re only a few yards past a passing point, and they will never, ever, no way, pull over to allow you to overtake!!!
They think the world was created around the needs of these horsey-type drivers to the total exclusion of all other drivers. If you try to remonstrate or suggest they reverse the three feet into the passing point to save you the 400 yards reverse to the next one you’re treated with such contempt (and occasionally foul language) that all you want to do is find somewhere dark to hide and end your worthless life as rapidly as possible. 😥
So if you’re coming to Dorset this summer: 1. Leave your damned caravan at home and rent a static instead, and 2. Forget your smug “Baby On Board” car sticker if you want to be treated with any respect – only a “Horse On Board” sign will hack it! 😆